No, Sam I am. I can't go to sleep without an Ambien. Seem so high they call me Mister Goodbye. Saying "Catch me if you can, catch, catch me if you can."
The wonders of the Internet, huh? Word arrived from my long lost friend, though they were brief and slightly troubling. I do hope she comes a-calling again soon.
Just stopping by briefly to document the fact that I will be in Auckland the next few days saying farewell to another of my best friends in all the world who is leaving for Australia. Will be a sad day, I imagine. Though in reality a triumph for him and his whanau. He's a great kid, and he'll be alright. Sure am gunna miss the dude though. He is one of the few people on the planet I can trust completely, and that makes him a rare find indeed. That motherfucker is a true success, and he can always count on me if he needs me; the same way as I can count on him. Take care of yourself over there, my brother.
In other news: I am devoid of anything interesting to say. The days swell and crash, then recede back into the ocean. My footprints in the sand wash away after each new one, and I watch the horizon to see if I can spot your plane. My sickness seems to be reducing its hold on me, but I can't tell if it is a permanent or temporary respite. Trying to look to the future whilst keeping a sneaky eye on what lurks on the sides of the roads in the present.
I can't seem to accept that anything positive could be coming up. I am damaged goods.
After this trip to the Big Smoke I will be taking an indefinite hiatus from the bottle. I have had enough for now, and it is time to get back out pounding the pavements. I want to spend my days in the new flat in productive ways at all possible times. I intend to exercise, write and improve my voice everyday. If not all three things, then at least two. I am hatching plans. I want to turn this whole thing around this year. My brother and I are going to find our peace, one way or another. Look the fuck out, we're on the rise.
Did you ever have to go to school with no lunch?
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